Julie Fowler: Being thankful used to mean something different

By Julie Fowler

Being thankful used to mean something different for me than it does today.

In the past, I might remember every now and then to throw out a thought about how grateful I was that my three kids were healthy or that I live in such a beautiful place or that I am lucky enough to be a stay-at-home mom. I was always super thankful when I found a deal on cool shoes or when we could afford to buy something neat for our house or take a relaxing vacation. And when I read about a family who lost a loved one or saw someone who was obviously sick or disabled, I was quick to shout my thanks to the universe that my family wasn’t the one suffering.

Julie Fowler, right, with her children Alec, bottom, Grace, left and Emma, top.

All that changed on March 22, 2008.

That’s the day my youngest daughter, Emma, who was 8 at the time, was diagnosed with a rare bone cancer called Ewing’s sarcoma. Throughout the next seven months, she fought through 14 rounds of chemotherapy and 25 days straight of radiation. And she did most of it with her cute, little girl sense of humor intact.

Then last spring we learned that her treatment had damaged her spine to the point where she’d have to have it fused from her shoulder blades to the small of her back. That was done in July. It was painful and in addition to most of her summer, she lost some of that silly innocence that helped carry her through each day.

But what she gained – what my entire family gained – was an appreciation of what’s truly important and what it means to be thankful.

I’ll start with what’s not important – the labels on your clothes, the size of your house, the car you drive, socializing with people just because of who they are or what they have. What is important is actively listening to what your kids are saying, taking time to spend with them be it on a walk or reading in bed at night, treasuring friendships that feed your soul, healthy food, health insurance.

These days I wake up each and every morning thankful for a new day with kids doing normal kid things like going to school, doing homework at the kitchen table, talking all at once about their days. I am grateful every day for the amazing Colorado skies, the ever changing weather, and those majestic mountains. And I even give thanks for the bickering between my kids, the frustrations of a sometimes too busy schedule, and for Emma singing at the top of her lungs into her microphone.

Twenty months ago my husband and I faced what is every parent’s worst nightmare – the possibility of losing a child. But we also were given the gift of seeing a new way of looking at life. This Thanksgiving, I am thankful that I now understand that life is about slowing down and savoring each and every moment. And you can bet that not a day passes that I don’t verbalize how grateful I am for the most basic of basics – life.